This stay at home mom is now a Working Mom!! Emphasis on the word “mom”. Finding a job for a new mom, in a new city, a new country, definitely not easy! It took me more than one year to find the job. For all mamas out there trying to find work after baby sabbatical, I feel you. It’s not easy and your confidence can quickly take a nose dive. But remember your worth and trust in yourself. We have to teach our kids by setting an example.
Truth be told even though I was trying to get a job, a part of my heart secretly wished some more time with my son. I knew being a working mom will bring a huge change in our lifestyle and I wasn’t ready to give up on snuggles just yet and god knew it.
Now, my son is one month shy of being two and soon he will be going to school, learn new things and start his adventure in the outside world. I guess seeing him grow and watching him slowly spread his wings made me realize it is time for me as well to leave the dream world and join the reality.
So, here I am writing my first blog post as working mama!! Super excited!! Here are few things, I have learned during my first week. If you are mom like me contemplating to go back to work, expect following.
First thing first, you are going to miss your little one to the point that you would want to run back to him. Pain is inexplicably. Separation anxiety in both moms and kids is real. I thought having cameras in the house will help but more I see him, more I miss him, more I want to touch him and hug him.
2 Be proud to be a working mom
You will be walking talking paradox because despite all the pain and missing your child, you will feel content. Happy to see your career back on track. Like everyone eats, sleeps, breathes irrespective of gender, the same logic should apply to working. Often women sacrifice their careers and dreams for their families or for what’s expected of them. I strongly believe we women, owe it to all women in the past, who fought for us and to women of future to make sure their lives are better. I love my son and I want him to grow up in the world of cerebral equality.
Your little stud muffin is growing at lightening speed. This realization will soon hit you like a train and so will be the guilt of a working mom. Every day, week and month is yet another milestone. Terrific twos will be one of the most important phases. Of my god!! Every time I look at my son and I scroll through the images of last two years in my phone I can’t believe how tiny he used to be. Being a working mom makes you to take a mental pause and let you see your journey so far. This feeling is surreal.
4 Working mom’s organizing skills are serious goals
If you thought you were an organized individual before baby and you maxed your organization and micro management skills post baby, wait till you start working. From play dates to meal plans, everything is going on excel. Thankfully, we have a nanny, therefore, no daycare pick ups and drops as of now but sheer coordination- her timing, my timing, my husband’s timing, running household, doing other chores and job, can be overwhelming. Being organized is not a choice but a need for a working mom.
5 Balance between work and time with toddler
All mommies have some special ways of bonding with their kids. I have loved our lazy afternoon snuggles but going back to work means no more of that. I have been trying to find other ways to create special moments on an ordinary day with my baby boy. I have to find my piece of heaven/haven with him. Our bubble, our “we” time! If you have any ideas do let me know. I might be working but I will always be a mom first.
6 You and your child will take time to adjust
Toddler might have severe meltdowns first few days when you start working. At least it happened to me. I would come back home from work and my son would be angry, frustrated and screamed a lot. Which is just not like my son. I think he missed me and didn’t know how to express it. It is a real patience tester. I have tried my best to keep calm and talk him through his emotions. I try to tell him, it’s alright to feel frustrated. I hope I can teach him to live his emotions and not suppress it. Every emotion is important.
7 Difficult to not bring your mommy side to work
For the first week you will consciously stop your baby voice and mom reflex at work. First day at work, I was afraid something would happen and my mommy voice will come out in reflex. For example, If someone is eating a cookie and I would go “No monkey, no more cookies, it’s almost lunch time.” Thankfully it never happened but it did take some conscious effort.
8 Feel like your pre-baby self
You will feel wonderful about dressing up but miss your sweat pants. Wearing make-up and long earrings is a luxury for stay at home moms. Going back to work means welcome accessories and high heels. In a way you will feel a little bit of your old-self with a major upgrade emotionally as a mom.
9 First job after sabbatical will always be special
You will forever be grateful to employers who showed trust in your abilities and gave you the opportunity post-sabbatical. Like I mentioned earlier, finding job post baby sabbatical is not easy and first employers who show faith in you will always be close to your heart.
10 Change in hubby’s routine
Your husband’s vacation is over. I have seen many of my other mommy friends doing everything on their own, if you are one of those moms than things are going to change for you and your hubby. Luckily, I never had to face this problem but it is still a big change in my husband’s routine.
Trusting another person with your baby’s care is the hardest thing you will ever have to do. No matter what is your preferred style of child care, day care or nanny, leaving your child with someone else is never easy. We have to remember, though, this is yet another milestone for you and your baby. So be patient and be kind to yourself. Let the transition sync in. Try not to over burden yourself with your own expectation god knows I have done it.
Mum Mum Ma
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